He Also Gives A Fantastic Graduation Speech May 13, 2008
What about?
Well, mainly, America’s shrinking world presence and the prevalence of terrorism and that devil Al-Queda and, also, the hunt for Osama Bin Laden to the gates of hell, people, managing to keep completely in line with the other obvious themes of that hallmark day in a person’s life - optimism, promise, hope. I was positively inspired afterwards and did not at all feel like crawling into a bomb shelter and staying there for the rest of my life, hidden, after hearing such words of encouragement.
He, however, never mentioned he was older than Alaska! http://www.thingsyoungerthanmccain.com/
Alas, no matter how effectively an episode of The Hills can make one regress to the mental capabilities of a toddler, it does nothing to turn back our biological clocks.
The site is fucking brilliant.
Wait - did old bags McCain speak at your graduation??
Awesome link, btw.
why is this feed not in my g-reader?
i’m voting for mccain too…which i haven’t fully decided is how i’m voting.
my grad speaker was condoleeza rice, so if mccain was yours, i’m pretty sure it means we may run the country some day. except in these progressive times you’ll be president (albeit, tequila scarfing/insomniac-ish president) and i’ll be sectretary of defense (a pretty mellow one at that, i’d think - also, it’d be renamed “Captain of the Defense of All Good Things).
d - i’m lovin’ this plan. kind of like how justin timberlake is lovin’ mcdonalds. america would become a place of Good Things and Good Times. imagine all the work i’d get done while being unable to sleep. repainting the oval office a lime green or cobalt blue. kicking it in dubai because our future lies in that country. mandating that all offices close during actual important events - like march madness and semi-annual sales at victoria’s secret (i guess those suckers will have to stay open.) and you could defend all this. sweet.
Someone just sent me that link the other day… too funny!
I would totally vote for YOU for president. The world needs more tequila!
exactly! there’s a rule that says the markets can’t close for more than 72 hours straight, which ruins thanksgiving (and more importantly, my birthday) and xmas weekends - DE.LEEEET.ED…in the name of All Good Things.
we’ve even got the multi-ethnic card kickin it, because i’d draw the irish out of the bars to vote (first time since kennedy) and you’d have, well, all the other races because we know how politics in this country (until we take over) is white or non-white.
as Captain of Defense of All Good Things, i think my office would have to be on Air Force One.
I think the problem with the country is we have people making decisions sober, that require at least some bit of insanity. We need someone who’s willing to get blitzed the night before deciding whether or not free trade is good.
d - as the first president to run on a campaign offering free tequila shots every Wednesday (and win!), i will only allow your office to be on Air Force One if you, in fact, are sure to wear Air Force Ones whenever you are in said office.
tranquil doorman - dude. (duuuuude). laughed out loud reading your comment. you are so, so right. can i sign you on to be my karl rove?
jen - you’re a doll. the world will be a good place when our only enemy is ourselves around free-flowing tequila. or something like that.
It would be my honor to your karl rove. I can’t wait for the first press conference:
“Did the president get hammered before negotiating the release of the hostages?”
“I can neither confirm nor deny that report…shit I could deny it, but that wouldn’t be true! How do you think we get things done in this administration? Through clarity!? Pssh, ask former president Bush where clarity got him.”
Well, it would be my honor to BE your karl rove. Must have been that vodka and lime…
i never take my air force ones off, so…
i’ll do you one better. this weekend i’ll be in st. louis, so while i’m sippin crystal with nelly i’ll sign him on for the campaign tour. since it must take him like 13 seconds to write a song i’ll get him to pen a campaign hit called “Tequila Freedom” or “Prez 4 Life” or “Eleckt Dat Booty” (which only works if Clinton loses because rumor has it she has a vagina).
tranquil doorman - vodka and lime, keep it up. that’s a good karl rove.
d - holy shit. i need to hear all of these songs immediately based on their titles alone. tell nelly that we’d prefer he change his plain band-aid to one that has more of a patriotic flair though, okay? some blue and stars, red and white stripes.
oh yeah. that’ll be my intro - ‘dude, you’re gonna need this band-aid.’
have a great weekend, prez.